Family life is complex, and everyone’s experience is personal and unique. But, there is one universal thing we all share when it comes to our families: a deep-seated desire to find love there. Sometimes we get what we’re looking for, but other times we’re met with our family’s (or our own) shortcomings. Flaws are hard to hide in close quarters, and when left unattended can often lead to hurt, resentment, or the words “We’re not on speaking terms.”
Add to that the world we live in, with its many distractions, and the divide can widen. There is constant noise coming from our phones and televisions demanding our time, money, and allegiances. It’s no wonder why we find our nearest are not always our dearest. We are being pulled in a lot of directions.
It may be hard to imagine, but Jesus had to contend with a complex family life too, and he lived during a time with similar noise and distractions. Sure, there weren’t televisions, but there were still pundits. He may not have had constant phone notifications, but the crowds certainly wouldn’t leave him alone. And these crowds were part of his problem. His extended family struggled with his sudden popularity and his lack of convention. Many thought he’d lost his mind. Some, in their frustration, tried to forcibly take custody of him. What a scene that must’ve been.
Yet, in no uncertain terms, Jesus made sure they knew his door would always be open to them. For him, blood was not thicker than water. Love was thicker than water. He made this point when his mother brought concerned relatives to see him, and he continued to make it throughout his ministry. He saw the many members of his family, related or not, as irreplaceable parts of one body. When one part was missing, the whole suffered. Likewise, when one part was honored, the whole celebrated.
To exemplify this, he once told a story of a father and his two sons. The younger son asked for his share of their inheritance early so he could make a life for himself, but in time he squandered the funds and became homeless. On the other hand, the older son stayed by his father’s side, dutifully working. There was jealousy in the tale, disappointment, estrangement—the whole family suffered—but at the end of the day Jesus spoke of a father forgiving enough to keep his door open, a wayward son humble enough to come home, and a brother who had to set his own ego aside to celebrate his family’s reunion.
Suffice to say, the reunion did not happen without a lot of work on all sides, and it might seem in your own unique story like an impossible outcome. But just remember…it began simply with an open door, a single step, and a deep breath. Beyond that, we can always improve our chances by setting the noisy world aside for a moment. Jesus encouraged many to do this very thing so that the noise would not become the only thing they heard. In the quiet, we can remind ourselves that our desire for love is shared. And if we lean into that, we might just discover what love can overcome, including the words “We’re not on speaking terms.”
Scripture references: Mark 3, Luke 15:11-32, 1 Corinthians 12:12-26, Colossians 3:12-15
